#52Ancestors, Week 26: Slow(er) Life

This post was moved to the Collecting Dead People blog:

Living the Slow Life

#52Ancestors #Week25/26 Fast & Slow

Interesting premise for both this week and next, so I shall tie them together - 'Fast' and 'Slow," a dichotomy.

I sometimes find myself envying the slower pace of days gone by, shown to us in so many ways as idyllic and pastoral - sitting on the front porch snapping beans, fishing in a nearby stream, or taking the buggy out to go visiting. All quieter activities than rush hour or the supermarket, but I've observed that there was really very little 'slow" about that way of life.

There are certainly a variety of reasons for the phrase "Grandma worked her fingers to the bone" or tales of Grandpa working the farm until weeks before his death:  if they hadn't, they wouldn't have kept the roof over their heads of food upon the table. Everything that needed doing was done by hand and by manual labor, with manual tools and the help of family and close friends. There used to be a great plenty of hurrying to get where one was going, to the next task, to prevent catastrophe (I'm thinking of the Locust Plague in Little House on the Prairie).

Farms took shape as they were purchased often side by side by brothers and then passed to their sons, often with parcels sold or traded back and forth or in at least one case in my family, an untimely death which brought the entire family together in order to pool resources to pay off the taxes. All this to say that none of this living was 'fast' or quick. One waited for the best planting and the best harvesting, tending slowly to both crops and growing children. Walks to school were often long and waits for news or trips to town were waited for with anticipation. 

I've wondered frequently what our world would be like with some additional slowness. Fast. A race to the finish. Being first to ... fill in the blank with whichever activity comes to mind. These phrases are frequent in our media and in our own heads. I am no exception but am grateful for how the pandemic has forced us to take stock of what's important. My life hasn't changed in huge ways, and I didn't take up bread baking (my mom does that!) but I do try to be more mindful about what is taking up my time. Blogging, for instance. This is my third stab at this particular entry, so I'm feeling behind and slow, but then I'm going to post it to one of the fastest places on Earth - social media, which has an attention span of 15 seconds? 

I don't think I've made a clear case, and perhaps that not my purpose, But our great-grandparents had both fast and slow, and so do we.  I think we need both.

#52Ancestors, Week 25: Fast (Divorces)

If anyone has been waiting for me to put out this week's blog post (I doubt it), I apologize for the delay.  I struggled to come up with anything for the prompt of "fast," but I had the inspiration this evening to discuss the "quickie" divorce.

I've been working on my genealogy for well over a decade now, and something I noticed early on was that Dade County, Florida, seemed to be the place to go if you wanted a fast divorce in the 1930s/40s.  It made sense for some of my relatives who LIVED in Florida, but there were others whose residences were far from the Sunshine State.  

A quick Google search revealed that Florida is a no-fault divorce state and it also offers simplified divorces.  I haven't been able to determine when this started, but currently, in order to apply for a divorce in Florida, at least one spouse must be a permanent resident for at least six months or a member of the armed forces stationed in Florida.  After that, a simplified divorce requires only the following:
* no minor/dependent children
* neither party seeking alimony
* division of property and financial obligations must be agreed to
A simplified divorce typically takes 30 days.

I mention the 30 days because, in most cases, it seemed my relatives were also in a hurry to remarry.  My grandfather's divorce from his first wife was in Dade County in 1944.  He then married my grandmother in June of 1944. I'm not certain how he managed the Florida residency requirement.  My best guess is that he was stationed in Florida at the time.  He also had a 13-year-old daughter with his first wife, so perhaps theirs was an uncontested divorce (still only a 4-6 week turnaround) rather than a simplified dissolution of marriage. 

Then you might remember a "Nobody Knows About" post concerning Jennie Grace Terpinitz.  She was a sometime resident of Florida, and that ended up being most convenient for her in terms of marriage. When her 14-year marriage to Wilbur Lambert ended in Dade County, Florida, in 1936, she had already become acquainted with her next husband, Peter William Amey.  So much could be proven through the area newspapers' society columns.  I'm guessing it was more than just an acquaintance, though, because Jennie and Peter were married in March 1936.

And while a 1936 city directory and the 1940 census placed her, respectively, in New Jersey and New York, she returned to Dade County when her 5-year marriage to Amey soured.  (Surely it didn't have anything to do with the fact that she was more than 20 years his junior...but I digress.)  Once again, there was a quick turnaround on the divorce and subsequent marriage.  The Florida Divorce Index cites her divorce in 1941, and she was married to her third husband, Elmer Clarence Johnson, on September 22nd of that same year.

Jennie didn't have children with any of her spouses, so it seems likely she went with the "simplified" option for both divorces.

#52Ancestors, Week 24: Last One Standing

This blog started out with the intent of memorializing relatives who seemed to have been lost to time.  And, as this week's #52Ancestors prompt/theme suggests, Cuzzin Heather and I are (evidently) the last ones standing as those interested in researching them.  Whether it's because they died young, died without children, were on the run from the law, were family outcasts - the list could go on - no one else is researching their fates.  Here are a few of them who have already been discussed in this blog:

Blog namesake, Horace Irwin Pearson:  Even though he was my grandfather's uncle, literally no one knew about Horace until I unearthed him during my genealogical wanderings.  A double amputee as a result of a railroad accident, Horace was little more than a mendicant at the time of his unfortunate demise. His sad ending (both his death and his burial) was what initially motivated us to start a grouping of posts called, "Nobody Knows About ---."

Horace's kid sister, Nettie M. Pearson:  Again, no one remaining on my grandfather's side of the family has heard of her.  Certainly, no one knows what became of her; in some ways, this is even more upsetting than knowing what happened to Horace. At least we know where he is buried! Nettie’s myriad marriages produced a single child, and he is also a member of the "Nobody Knows About" Club.

On my ggg grandfather's side, there was an accomplished woman by the name of Jennie Grace Terpinitz.  A 1921 graduate of the University of Illinois, she was a talented musician and enlisted during World War II. She was a trailblazing female who married 3 times, but she does not seem to have left any children, and I cannot figure out where/when she died.  It doesn't appear anyone else cares to know.

The aforementioned Nettie's son, Pierson McClure/Joseph Miller: This is Nettie's son from her first marriage, but he appears to have been adopted by a later husband (though not the last).  I managed to track him through the name change, but he disappears from all documents in the 1940s.  Since nobody knows about Nettie, it stands to reason that nobody knows about Pierson/Joseph either.

Cuzzin Heather’s List

Horace's cousin, my 2nd great-grandmother Florence Chamberlain: While I have a photo of her from my grandmother and a rich family connection to my grandmother's family (her many siblings and lots of cousins for my mom and my generations), Florence is something of an enigmatic figure. She may have been an orphan - no one knows.  Her 3rd son (and possibly other children) were not her husband's children, and of the 15 or so known grandchildren, only 2 were available for interview or remembered/knew anything about her, and even that produced negligible information.

Florence's ne’er-do-well eldest son, Uncle Herbert Chamberlain. Gramps remembered him, his 7-years older brother who disappeared at 20. Another member of the "Nobody-Knows-About" club, he nevertheless left nieces, great-nieces and nephews and one very stubborn great-great-niece and her cousin who have tried, and so far-failed, to determine his fate.

Fern Evelyn McClain Grimmett Anderson Christianson:  Aunt Fern was not alone or hiding. However she seems to have led a somewhat independent for the times kind of life, blazed a trail first to Chicago and then to California for herself and her children, thrice divorced (or possibly widowed once or twice). Despite her two children and a small number of grandchildren and step-grandchildren, I've been unable to unearth even a single identifiable photo or reminiscence. A few photos of my great-grandmother and her sisters/niece survive, all unlabeled.  

These are just a few of our more notable “lost to time” relatives. There are many more - inside and outside of our shared lines. We will continue searching and recording what we can.

Our dead are never dead to us, until we have forgotten them. —George Eliot

#52Ancestors, Week 23: So Many Descendants

This post was moved to the Collecting Dead People blog:

So Many Descendants

#52Ancestors #Week23 - So Many Descendants

This week’s prompt made me laugh out loud. I am Irish Catholic on my mother’s side.  That’s it, that’s the blog, lol.

I don’t have any idea the exact number of descendants (I could count them, but my grandfather had 27 first cousins, and that was just on his dad’s side!)  However, when I looked at Pulaski County, Illinois and my 2nd great grandfather, I found the extraordinarily large families I needed in Mine and Cuzzin’s neck of the woods.

Harry Coleson, my Gramps’ biological father, was an only child, his mother likely having died in his infancy as he was raised by his grandmother. However, he was surrounded by loads of aunts, uncles and cousins. As of today’s research, his mother was born toward the middle of her parents’ twelve children, and her father (Thomas Jefferson Parker) was one of fourteen!  Harry was married and together with his wife Amelia had 9 children (2 of their daughters died in infancy), and that's in addition to my Gramps, his other son.

As for the number of descendants of these families, I went through my trees and made a bit of a list. If I include the living and the long passed, the number exceeds hundreds, but what ends up being more interesting is that with 12 or 14 children, most of whom lived reasonably long lives for the times, the names of in-laws and grandchildren end up encompassing many of the area’s surnames!  This is how my Cuzzin and I keep finding ourselves chasing our relationship to one another around in circles!

For those that care to read on, I’ll outline some of the family below. Harry Coleson, only child, had 28 known grandchildren. As I am his descendant and I have a general idea of how many cousins I have in both my family and those descended from his wife Milly, let me just close with my answer to this week’s prompt:  A LOT!

Harry Coleson married Amelia “Milly” Kesner:

Lloyd Edgar Coleson, had 6 - 9 children

Mabel Mae Coleson, had 2 daughters

Frank E Coleson, had 3 children

Cassie Coleson - died in infancy

Elise Marie - died in infancy

Jessie Marie Pauline Coleson, had 4 children

Viola M Coleson, had 3 sons

Wilber Coleson, had 1 daughter?

Roy C. Coleson, had 2 children

Harry Coleson and Florence Hughes Chamberlain:

Clyde W. Chamberlain, had 7 children, 28 grandchildren, 30+ great-grands