Tuesday, February 7, 2023

Nobody Knows About - Lulu McClain Lowe

 Lulu was my dad's grandmother, and he remembers her more vaguely, as Lulu died when Dad was 10 and my aunt was turning 6. Lulu died of stomach cancer. I have no idea how long she was ill. She was not talked about and there was never a photo out of my grandpa's mother when I was growing up (or any other family members except for the grandchildren). 

When I got curious about genealogy, I started untangling the complications of her family. Lulu Abigail was named for her maternal grandmother, and her father died when she was 7 years old, and the family moved from the farm to the city.  Her mother ended up raising at least 2 of her grandchildren - the illegitimate daughter of Lulu's eldest sister and a grandson, probably while his father was in prison.

Lulu's oldest sister left her child with her mother, likely while that little girl was still an infant. Both of Lulu's brothers were routinely on the wrong side of the law, as was a brother-in-law. Lulu grew up in this environment or at least on the periphery of it, and I can only imagine that her home and school life may have at the very least been compromised. School records for her might exist, and that's something I'll need to look into.

Lulu married at the age of 23, to Gus Lowe. Just about 2 years ago, I discovered (with Rachel's help and some old newspapers) that Gus had been previously married and had a daughter.  That little girl was raised by her grandparents as well, before she and her mother left Iowa for California. By the time I found out about this, Grandpa and his only brother, as well as this half-sister they never knew were all gone. There is no indication that they ever knew of one another, but I have to imagine that Lulu knew her husband had been married previously, and perhaps they discussed the child?  I'll never know, nor how Lulu thought about it.

I do know that this family loved music, although from what I can gather, it was Gus and his 1st wife, and his sons. I do know that Lulu played piano, but I don't know if this interest came from her husband or her family of origin. I know that she was passionate about church work, and I have a few pictures of her laughing with her sisters. I know that my grandpa got a train engine and tracks for Christmas one year, and it was the Depression, so he used his mother's sewing drawers for box cars. 

Prior to World War II, my grandparents got married with what you might call some impulsivity. Both were 18, and they had to cross into South Dakota to have the deed done. They promptly moved in with Grandpa's parents, and 4 years later they divorced. It's been said that Lulu was difficult to live with, but I can also see a young and inexperienced couple, personality clashes and cramped quarters. At any rate, during the war, Grandpa and Grandma reunited, remarried in 1943 and when the war was over, went home for a visit and then set up an apartment in Minneapolis. Grandpa's younger brother Jack had been in the war as well, I'n sure it was a source of both pride and grief for Lulu's only 2 children to be in such a place.

When my dad was born, they sent him every summer to spend a month with Gus and Lulu, and later his sister went with him. Per the many dozens of photos I have, most taken with my grandpa's camera, that she and Gus were besotted by my dad, their first grandchild. My dad does not have happy memories, and my perspective on that is two-fold. While it's probably true that Gus and Lulu weren't as affectionate as (especially) my grandma was, it was also a very long journey and long time to be away from one's parents for such a little boy.

I don't know any more about Lulu than that. I don't know which of her 4 sisters is which in the unlabeled photos I have. I wish I knew more about her relationship with her mother. I don't know if she liked to cook or loathed it. I don't know if she had hobbies beyond church work. No war time letters survive. I know her husband couldn't bear losing her and moved from their house to an apartment. I don't know when he began drinking, it may have been while she was ill, but that's Gus' story. I know that her son, daughter in law and grandchildren practiced her Lutheran faith, which I believe she adopted from her Norwegian husband. One of my dad's cousins was named for her, and I have 2 tiny porcelain angels that were saved after her death. I have not seen their graves, as I haven't been to Sioux City since I was a kid.  Perhaps a road trip.


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